


Fragments of a Dream

by Rumieru



Category: Fate/Grand Order
Genre: Happens near the end of Soloman chapter, Other, this is my way of coping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-13 04:44:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21238397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rumieru/pseuds/Rumieru
Summary: As he walks through the halls of Chaldea one last time, Romani thinks back about his experiences and feelings the past year.





	Fragments of a Dream

Clutching his file and saying that he has to go check on something, Romani takes leave from the Central Command Room, leaving Da Vinci in charge in place of him. She says nothing, and gives him a small, sad smile and a nod. Afterall, he'd spent countless nights at her workshop table, crying and complaining while she teased him as he was writing out two sets of letters. He'd have to go deliver them now.

The infirmary was the room closest to the Command Room, it'd been his home for the almost the last decade, right after he'd graduated from medical school. Rifling through his notes regarding Mash and Ritsuka, he brews a pot of tea and turns to his laptop, accessing the 'secret' folder Mash once threatened to delete. The printer in the corner of the room wakes as it begun spitting out piece after piece of paper, each containing the words he'd never been able to bring himself to tell them. A familiar tune plays, and he shifts his attention to the message notification.

>   
Magi✰Mari: Are you ready, Roman-kun? Are you really okay with this?
> 
> DrRomantic: Well.. I never got the chance to confess to Ritsuka, but maybe, this is for the best. Perhaps I was never meant to be in this era.
> 
> Magi✰Mari: Ah, you mean when you bungled your confession in the greenhouse? What was it again-
> 
> DrRomantic: STOP! PLEASE!
> 
> Magi✰Mari: Ahaha.. It's been fourteen years now, did you enjoy your new life?
> 
> DrRomantic: There were a lot of things I never got to try, but this past year, has been a lot of fun. And this time, I can finally do something to protect them, instead of not being able to do anything while watching them get hurt.
> 
> Magi✰Mari: Even though your next act will hurt them?
> 
> DrRomantic: Well...
> 
> Magi✰Mari: What about the promises you made with them to travel once everything is over? Did you not each choose a destination?
> 
> DrRomantic: S-stop it.. please. I know, that they might come to hate me after finding out the truth.
> 
> Magi✰Mari: Well, I did tell you to stop hiding things from them and to stop keeping secrets. What are you, a girl?
> 
> DrRomantic: This was for their sake too. If the impostor Solomon were to use clairvoyance to expose what they knew, they'd be in even more danger
> 
> Magi✰Mari: Hmpf. That's nothing more than an excuse.
> 
> DrRomantic: Well.. I'll admit that I'm afraid that they would have had come to reject me if I'd told them, but, I have no regrets, this was the only path.
> 
> Magi✰Mari: Hmm. If you've made up your mind, then.. I'll say this just once. Thank you.
> 
> DrRomantic: Thank you too, Merl- no, no, NO. I won't give you that satisfaction- Thank you, Magi✰Mari:. For being here for me all this time.

From the edge of his vision, Romani catches a servant materializing at his doorway, with white robes and flowing white hair. He had to keep himself from turning to face him, as he knew the other had a smug grin on his face at the moment.

"Is this what you really wish to do?"

He could feel the pair of violet eyes piercing through him, and understood it was no use to hide. The Magus of Flowers was, ironically, one of the people he had come to rely on the most, in the other's guise as a net idol. Picking at his gloved fingers to keep himself from shivering, he took a deep breath as he gathered the printed papers, splitting them into two sets and binding them.

"If it were the old me- I mean, the previous King Solomon, I would probably have had just went "That, too, is fine, I suppose." or "Ah, so that's how it is.", but now.. It hurts, knowing that I'd lose the life I got to share with them. Knowing that.. what I'd have to do, will hurt them too."

Instead of replying, the wizard simply moved slightly closer to Romani, who finally turns to look at the other.

"Are you getting closer to feed off my emotions? Even at a time like this, you're an absolute slimeb-"

He finds himself interrupted as Merlin pulls him into a hug. Although they were around the same height, Merlin seemed to feel slightly taller, and slightly bigger than the slightly scrawny Doctor. Ever since Ritsuka and Mash returned from Londonium, he'd found himself sleeping and eating even less, desperately trying to think of a way to defeat the impostor, and desperately trying to sustain their existence in increasingly harsh conditions. He doesn't resist as the wizard strokes his hair, letting himself slump slightly onto the other's shoulder, biting his lips so as to not begin to cry. As the hand slows, Romani finds himself staring right into the violet eyes of the smiling wizard

"I wouldn't deny that, but, isn't this what you used to do for the Master when they'd return from a mission? As you know, I'm unable to feel emotions on the scale humans do, so I'm just here copying you. You should feel flattered. Or.. hm, perhaps you'd prefer this?"

Merlin steadies Romani as he steps back, and light floods the latter's vision as the scent of flowers rise in the room. As it fades, he finds himself standing in front of his goddess, Magi✰Mari, with the same violet eyes and iridescent hair of the form he had before. A small slender hand stretches forward to hold his, and a familiar, sweet, soothing voice called out to him.

"You've done well, Roman-kun. It's alright to cry if you wish."

A sob bubbles outwards from his chest, and he finds himself crouching and clutching at the dress of the girl in front of him. They'd spend moments like this, with him coughing into his sobs and her slowly stroking his hair and face, until the beep of the tea being ready jolts him back up to his feet. Shakily wiping away his tears, he pulls open a drawer to pick out sweets and cookies, while pouring the tea into two flasks.

"I did promise to welcome them back with a warm cup of tea.", trying to disguise a sob into a chuckle, he continues. "I hope they wouldn't be too mad at me."

His companion shifts back into his usual form, taking the flasks from him and putting them under his sleeve, his eyes settle on a wall scroll of Magi✰Mari as he sinks into the Doctor's favourite armchair, sighing softly.

"That would be impossible."

, Romani jumps slightly as he meets the stern expression in the usually mischievous violet eyes. Merlin smirks a little, before shifting onto the infirmary bed and laying on his side.  
"There's no way they wouldn't be upset at what you're about to do."

Clenching his fists as a small anger begins to boil within him, Romani snaps.  
"I- I don't have a choice. I-I mean, there's no helping it. They can hate me all they want, it'd only be natural if they did. After all, I'm just not someone worthy for people to like."  
Clutching the papers close, Romani turns and almost storms out of the infirmary.

His feet bring him to the great Library in the base, with it's massive collection of books, both fictional and non-fiction, as well many texts containing the stories of different servants and historical figures that the mages and staff had decided to research. After Ritsuka had recovered from the week-long nightmare inflicted by meeting King Solomon and successfully escaping from the prison tower in their dreams, their counselling sessions had moved from the infirmary or their personal rooms, to be mostly held in the Library. They had meant to see him after Mash's turn, but she'd returned after a few minutes, asking the Doctor if he could be the one to go meet them as she felt that they shouldn't be disturbed at the moment. Gathering his notes and his pen, Romani had headed down to the library, opening the doors to find their eyes glued onto a heavy tome, one that spoke of the lives of King David and King Solomon.  
Their daily counselling sessions and talks continued in the library, with him trying to volunteer small bits of information if he thought it was safe to.

>   
"Say, Doctor. Are you maybe a big fan of King Solomon because he has a thousand wives?"
> 
> Romani had almost dropped his mug and spat out his coffee.
> 
> "Wha-what no. No way!!"
> 
> "But Da Vinci-chan and Mash are always teasing you about being single in your thirties, so-"
> 
> A blush crept up his face as he hid his face behind gloved hands.
> 
> "Having that many partners would be a lot of trouble, don't you think? There would probably be a lot of infighting and conflict. I would very much prefer only having one partner. Just one person I could fully devote myself to."
> 
> The King had had to be careful with the ones he'd chosen to spend his nights with. The ones who were closer to each other would often set up betting pools to try to predict who he would spend the night with, while those that weren't often mocked or teased each other, which could result in uglier conflict or them trying to manipulate him or those around them to gain a more favorable position for themselves. Even on the days he had tried to hide away, alone from anything and anyone, he'd find himself getting jumped by them at any given opportunity. 'Just get it over with, it'd be easier than rejecting them', there were families or nations that had tense relations with each other, all offering their daughters to him. Had he spent his time with one, but not another, it could have meant that a war would break out back in their homeland. So, for the sake of those who had given themselves to his teachings, and having offered him their tribute, it was his duty to preserve for the sake of their peace.
> 
> Romani snaps out of his stupor to find a pair of eyes gazing right at his, the other's hand on their forehead as they leaned close enough for him to feel their breath on his shoulder.
> 
> "Ah, so you don't have a fever. You seemed kind of dazed, so I got worried. Are you sure you've slept enough, Doctor? But, fully devoting yourself to just one person, eh? You really are a good person, Roman!"
> 
> Theirs was a smile that would haunt him in his dreams and his deepest thoughts. As he slowly started to settle down with helping them in their research, there was a day where he mustered enough courage to ask them a single question.
> 
> "Say, Ritsuka... Do you hate the King of Mages?"
> 
> Although they had no way of knowing, and although he had absolutely no intention of telling them, no matter how much Magi✰Mari or Da Vinci yelled at him, he couldn't bring himself to meet the young Master in the eye, after all, the one who presented himself as their worst enemy, was **him** or rather, someone wearing his skin. If it was his wished that allowed this to happen, then-
> 
> "I don't. Solomon- King Solomon was someone who wished for the wisdom to rule well, right? Instead of wishing for something to benefit himself, he chose to wish for something that would benefit his kingdom. So, I believe that King Solomon- the real King Solomon would probably have a valid reason if he were to do something like this. After all, didn't you mention that the one we are facing could be an impostor? Even King David said that it wouldn't be possible unless all of his secret lovers were to betray hi-"
> 
> Hot, damp patches begin to bloom on his gloves and lab coat, as he tried in vain to stop the tears from coming. Shakily hiding himself behind the book in his hands. Ritsuka had noticed, and stood up to approach the Doctor, gently prying the book away from his iron grip.  
"Wah- W-why are you crying, Doctor?!?"
> 
> "I-i-it's nothing!! Something just got in my eye is all!"
> 
> "You're crying to much for that to even be the slightest bit plausible! At least try to think of a better one! Is something the matter, Roman?"
> 
> Unable to hide his goofy smile as he wiped the dampness from his face, he gives a small laugh to Ritsuka.  
"I'm just really happy... that you don't.. hate him... is all."
> 
> "You're weird, Roman, you don't have this much of a reaction whenever anyone comments about Magi✰Mari even though you've been saying she's the most important thing in your life."
> 
> "Ehh?! I have?! I was sure those were my inner thoughts!!!"
> 
> After they parted ways, Roman found himself dreaming of a life lost past, of a sky filled with rising smoke and the scent of wood and incense. He was on the altar, surrounded by people from across the region, as the King of Magic, the King chosen by God to receive his wisdom. Countries and nobles from all around offered him their daughters, as did merchants and traders, as his wives, concubines, as though trying to buy a part of his reputation for their own use. He'd agreed to them, if only for preventing the chance of any deep held grudges resurfacing towards his country or the others', were they to feel slighted by him. Truly, it could have been anyone else that was the king, and nothing would have had changed. All those gathered around him, submitting themselves, kissing his feet, had only come for his title. Even Queen Sheba, with whom he had managed to confide in, had approached only due to his reputation as the King of Magic. So, never being understood, without anyone really approaching him as a human, the King stood on the altar, surrounded by a sea of humans, yet all alone.

Interrupted from his thoughts by a humming behind him, Romani turns to see Merlin peeking into the Master's notebook, with post its stuck to some pages while taking down the information of all the summoned servants they had in Chaldea, as well as some of the others they'd met. On David's page in particular, after an episode of him and Blackbeard declaring Magi✰Mari to be Abishag, and the latter saying that she should be shared between all of them, Romani had written "Slimebag" on a note and stuck it to their pages, and when Merlin torn his world apart in Babylonia, he'd written some even more colourful ones for him.

" 'Scum, World's worst King Adviser, Slimebag, DEFINITELY NOT ACTUALLY Magi✰Mari!!' Wow, Roman-kun, you really had quite a bit to say about me, didn't you? I never knew you took such a deep interest in lil' ol me."

Rushing over to snatch the book from the cambion's hands, Romani snapped. "I'd never take an interest in you, you're the worst. Why are you following me around, you're being pretty annoying today!"

A smirk crosses Merlin's face as he sets the book down, this was actually a little more fun than he'd expected.  
"Oh my, thanks for the compliment."

An accusing finger jabs at the air an inch from his nose as the Doctor tries to make sense of his response.  
"What do you mean compliment?!"

"Well, all I heard was 'You're being pretty today', since I'm trying to focus on the positives, and well, I do think I look particularly beautiful today."

Hissing between his teeth, Romani rushes out, away from Merlin as fast as he could, while the latter follows at a distance, trying to keep himself from laughing.

As he crosses the cafeteria on the way to the greenhouse, Roman pauses as he catches sight of the various pots and pans. During on of their medical checks, Ritsuka had arrived early to see a pile of instant ramen packages at the side of his table. What followed was them dragging Romani out by the ear to the cafeteria, or bringing food over with Mash whenever they had some spare time to cook. Occasionally, Da Vinci would find the time to leave her workshop and sit together with them for a meal, all the while making verbal jabs at him for needing to be nannied and nagged upon by two teenagers.

>   
It was shortly after they'd returned from Jerusalem, having gathered some ingredients when finishing up the Spriggans there, Ritsuka had dragged Roman from his room after finding even more ramen cups and biscuit wrappers strewn around the floor. As Ritsuka started preparations for the meal, Roman had offered to help out. He'd told them that while he hadn't gotten the chance to really learn to cook much if at all, once all of the singularities are fixed, and the proper history of the World restored. Once he finally has time to live the way he wished.. He'd like to try his hand at baking. Cakes and sweets were his absolute favourite foods, especially the ones with strawberries and cream.
> 
> "If that's the case then, why don't we go to Japan for your turn during the trip? We could go pick strawberries, and I can teach you how to bake your own shortcake."
> 
> During dinner a week before, Ritsuka had suggested that, after all their work was done, they could go on a trip together. Mash, Da Vinci, and the both of them. Mash listed down the scenery she'd wanted to see, those that Roman had showed her on the monitor, or in the books in the library. Da Vinci, on the other hand, had produced an extensive list of where her works were displayed. Milan, Paris, London, among the handful. Romani had yelled at her a little, saying that it would take too long, while Mash and Ritsuka just laughed. He was the only one who didn't have a suggestion, after all, once their work was done, he'd be....
> 
> "That sounds great, Ritsuka."  
A big smile broke on his face, even if it wouldn't come to pass, just the thought of it had cheered him up a lot. Getting to spend more time with them, having their meals together, it was almost as if they were a small family, the four of them, it'd be too good to be true
> 
> The Master mirrors his smile with one of their own, one bright and brimming with hope for a tomorrow that has yet to be confirmed.  
"Then it's a date, Doctor!"

Sneaking over to the fridge, Romani opens the door to find bowls and containers of different colours and contents. There was fish paste, chestnuts, egg, mochi cakes and a bowl of cake batter among the other things he couldn't identify.  
"Ah, Ritsuka did say they were going to make Osechi for the New Year's." With a small smile, he dips a small spoon into the bowl of cake batter, and brings it to his lips. It tasted of the butter cake that the Master and Mash had sent back from Babylonia on his birthday, an act that prompted King Gilgamesh to jokingly threaten to execute them for treason, since they were also learning how to bake them from Siduri, claiming they were stealing his national secrets.

"The Master's gonna get mad if they find out you were sneaking food again, Roman-kun"

They were words that cut through the fluffy sweetness of his little treat, swallowing with the now bitter aftertaste, Romani turns to Merlin with a pout.  
"It's the last time, so. Can you just leave me alone or keep quiet and stop ruining everything for me?"

Merlin smirks and he waves the stack of papers he was carrying for the Doctor.  
"Well, if you want me to leave you alone, I can always go read these out loud in the Central Command Room."

Romani stuffs the bowl back into the fridge as he swipes at Merlin's head with the spoon.  
"W-why you!!"

Merlin dodges the attack with a smug grin, and pushes Romani on the back, causing him to fall over onto a table.  
"Well, if you don't want me to, then just let me follow you around a little more."

Begrudgingly, Romani then trudges off to the Greenhouse. Among the fruit trees, crop beds and flowerbeds, Romani singles out an area where he'd been carefully raising the flowers. Merlin takes the chance to lay under a large apple tree, and gazes at the sky from the glass ceiling above. On occasion, the white flurry of the blizzard eases up and allows a breathtaking view of the night sky, one such night was the one where he'd watched Romani attempt at his confession.

> During the time where they were trying to establish a stable connection to Uruk, with Sheba not being able to get a reading and waiting for Da Vinci to finish with working on the latest upgrade, Ritsuka had mentioned that the Mid Autumn festival was soon. Mash had gotten excited hearing about a festival where people gather for picnics to watch the moon over tea, and the two had prepared some, along with cakes and dumplings, asking the Doctor to accompany them to the greenhouse. Fortunately, the blizzard had let up on the night of the full moon, and they'd just finished up most of the tea, with Mash leaving to fetch more. With his heart racing as he lay down next to Ritsuka, Romani slowly wrapped his hand around their own. It surprised him how small and delicate they were, the hands that held the future of Humanity, the hands that would save the world they lived in, it reminded him that they were far too young to be burdened with all of these, and nearly brought him to tears. Taking a deep breathe to steady his voice, he laced his fingers around theirs.
> 
> "Say, Ritsuka, the moon is beautiful tonight, is it not?"
> 
> He squeezed his eyes shut as he felt the heat bloom all over his face. After a few moments of silence, where he neither got a reply nor did Ritsuka pull their hand away, he slowly turned towards them and opened his eyes, to find the Master dozing softly. A warm, gentle sight, as though none of the trials that had opposed them existed. Laughing to himself, he brushed their fringe away from their eyes, sitting up as Mash returned.

"Now that I think about it, you were horribly indirect with it, weren't you, Roman-kun?"

Romani pauses from picking flowers, now carrying an armful of them. He sits and frowns for a moment, but looks up towards his companion with a small smile.  
"Well, it's more romantic that way, don't you think? Haha.. And besides, that may be for the best." After picking a handful of flowers of his own, Merlin follows Romani down the hallway once again. They come to a stop shortly after, in one of the staff bedrooms. The door unlocks and they find a small white creature curled up in the bed sheets, who promptly bounds towards them to spin kick Merlin in the face. "Ack!! W-Why you, Cath Palug!! My face is my biggest asset here! Shoo! Why do you get to sneak around in girl's bedrooms while I get judged for it? That's no fair." A tap on his shoulder prompts Merlin to turn to his companion. "And you, coming into a girl's room while she's out on a mission, that's sexual harassment!" Romani sighs and motions for him to set the papers and tea flasks down on Mash's desk. Aside from a few souvenirs she'd brought back from the various singularities, her room was relatively empty. Pressed flowers and small trinkets depicting nature and scenery littered the bookshelf he'd help build when she first got her own room, the present that he'd promised her when he'd managed to wrestle some freedom from Olga Marie for her. A homunculus among many others, created by immoral mages to further their own studies, without regard for the consequences or the effect it has on the others. She was the only survivor, innocent and pure, without a shred of resentment for the ones who had doomed her to such a fate. If it was his legacy, his creations that led to her suffering like this then- no, she never felt as though she was suffering. Never once looked towards the other humans around Chaldea with jealousy or resentment about her own shortened life, always earnest, trying to live her life to the fullest. Merlin watches curiously as Romani sits at her desk and arranges the flowers around his letter. An Azalea, pink and white carnations, sweet pea flowers, stalks of white heather, hydrangea, an iris, a tea coloured rose, purple hyacinths. Romani jumps as Merlin sets down some forget-me-nots between his arrangement. "Ah, but, that would seem selfish of me." "If you ask me, both the girl and the master would probably prefer it if you were a little more selfish. They would have had worried about you a little less."

Although he was meant to be her guardian, their doctor, and acting commander, ever since they'd returned from the fourth singularity, it had seemed that they were the ones who were looking out for him a little more. The pair had started asking him more personal questions during their counselling sessions, setting goals together for when they'd be released from their duties. Even the day before, while knowing full well her body would give out were she to fight any longer, she'd chosen to accompany Ritsuka to see through what she'd promised Galahad to do, fix the cause of the singularities, and complete Chaldea's mission to bring a bright future for humanity, even if it's one that doesn't include herself. Watching her was painful, her courage and smile was constantly reminding him of his own cowardice and inaction in his previous life, but at the same time, he immeasurably proud and strove to be a bit closer to them. A little bit braver, and just a litter bit stronger, to be someone they could depend on.

Merlin pulls Romani and chair away from the table as the first of his tears splashes on the desk, barely missing the papers.

"Woah there, wouldn't want to ruin the ink now, would we?"

Romani gurgles softly in reply as big pearl-like tears splash into his lap, interrupted by Fou bounding up and tapping on his hands.  
"Uuuuuuuuuwwhhh.. Ma- Mash has been rather rebellious of late, what if all these causes her to hate me even more?"

Merlin facepalms and smacks Romani over the back of the head.  
"Too late for thoughts like that now, besides, didn't you say this was the only choice you had? Stop second guessing yourself, or you might be late for the grand finale."

"You just want to send me to an early grave, don't you, Merlin?"

Grabbing the Doctor and shoving him out of the room, Merlin slams the door shut behind him as Fou begins to lead them forward through the hallway, turning a corner and bouncing onto a clutter work desk. Romani admired the ring-shaped tea stains and the massive array of papers, gears and parts scattered around. Da Vinci had always been an organized mess, it was the main reason why most of the staff didn't like coming to the work shop, as even accidentally shifting something would result in a lengthy lecture from the Caster, even Olga Marie had introduced her to Ritsuka was "the weirdo who lives in the workshop". Romani's hand reaches towards a small photo frame beside a miniature model of Baast-nyan, with four seats instead of the three that were on the version they'd used in the sixth singularity. It held a photo of the four of them, smiling over the butter cake that Ritsuka had made to celebrate his birthday. Within the smaller scaled eye spotlights, plush seat cushions and steering wheel, was surely, their shared hope of being able to face the future together, both for him, and for Da Vinci who was the only one would'd known that it's inevitable that he'd have to leave.  
"The world won't be incinerated? Why, you ask? Well, from what I know of him, I'm definitely smarter and wiser than the 'Wise King' Solomon, so, I guess my prediction has a higher chance of coming true. Don't you agree, Roman-kun?"

Ah, as always, she could declare such hopeful things with a natural ease. And a slightly flirtatious wink. Ritsuka would always play along with her antics, while Mash and himself got flustered, those days were, among all the chaos in the world, innocent and fun.

>   
It was shortly after he'd been reduced to a bawling mess in front of Ritsuka after the master said they didn't hate King Solomon. Romani had brought cakes and tea over to the workshop, singing half-drunkenly to Da Vinci that he had something to celebrate. The Caster, was, of course, focused on her work and had tried to shoo him off, saying that he'd get stains and crumbs on her papers and wooden parts. After he'd slumped over the desk with a goofy grin and started talking to himself, she'd no choice but to sit down and be a sounding board for him while he gushed over the Master.
> 
> "Ri-Ritsuka said that they don't hate me- I mean, that they didn't hate King Solomon, that the real one wouldn't do something like incinerate humanity without a good reason. I was- I was so happy I ended up crying in front of them. What should I do, Da Vinci-saaaan. They're going to think I'm more wimpy and weird than they do alreadyy..."
> 
> "To be fair, I don't think it'd actually make a difference, I mean, with your Magi✰Mari obsession, your constant screaming and shrieking while watching over them in the Rayshifts, and the fact that the little white squirrel doesn't even acknowledge your existence. You're already plenty wimpy and weird."
> 
> "I didn't come over here with treats just for you to bully me, Da Vinci!!"
> 
> "I didn't ask you to come over either!"
> 
> "Ah sheeeeeeeeeesh."  
Romani slumps over the table now with a dejected sigh, prompting Da Vinci to hide a laugh. Putting down her pen, she heads over to where he was seated and picks up the slice of cake laid down in front of him, prompting him to jump up and swipe it back from her hands, glaring daggers. It'd reminded her of a small ginger kitten, trying to look scary. As much as he didn't want to appear wimpy, the immature way he acted certainly didn't help, and probably led to the staff and even Ritsuka themselves trying to lookout for him or look after him, not that he himself would ever notice, as he'd just brush it off as something that's too good to be true.
> 
> "If you're that infatuated with the Master, then, why don't you just tell them how you feel? What was it again- eh, let's see...' 'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.', was it? One of those 'romantic' quotes you like so much. Why don't you practice what you preach, Doctor Romantic-san?"
> 
> Da Vinci lifts her gaze to see the Doctor turning beet-red, it was almost as if she could see the steam leaking out from his ears. A devilish grin crosses her features for a second, as she starts to probe further.  
"Well, why don't I lock you both in a room until you finally confess to one another? It seems that Ritsuka is pretty fond of you as well."
> 
> While she usually wouldn't be one to play the matchmaker or probe too much into their relationship affairs, she and Mash were both too painfully aware of how neither the Master nor Roman could make the first move, despite their mutual attraction. Romani due to his pessimistic nature, and his opinion that he doesn't belong in the current age, and the Master due to Romani being their work superior and how oblivious he'd been to the hints they'd given him.
> 
> "W-what are you talking about, Da Vinci?! I mean, Ritsuka, th-they deserve a lot better than what I can give, and they'd certainly deserve someone who'd be able to stay by their side, and someone who isn't about fourteen years older than them, that's too big an age gap for the current world we live in!"
> 
> "Well, technically speaking, Roman-kun, aren't you like 14? If we count the years since you're been reborn, you'd be a minor. That'd mean Ritsuka is a criminal, wouldn't it? Surely you wouldn't want the person you secretly admire to go to jail because of you? Or shall we count from where you left off in your previous life? About 60, was it? Doesn't that make you 74 now? What a creep, crushing on an 18 year old high school student as hard as you are."
> 
> "Y-y-you're the worst! I regret even coming here to tell you anything, I'm leaving!!"
> 
> Leaving her cup of tea and the second plate of tea biscuits, Romani runs out of the workshop, as bright and as red as a tomato while Da Vinci watches on. Even as a middle aged man, his mannerisms reminds her of a middle schooler, perhaps a result of him never really having learnt to live as a human in his past life. Indeed, he did act too much like a fourteen year old, so much so that she was half tempted to ask a favour from a certain AUO in Chaldea for a potion of youth to be able to tease him a little more.

Romani leaves hydrangea flowers and sweet pea flowers in a relatively empty corner of her desk, knowing too well she'd be annoyed were he to place them anywhere else. With a glance around the workshop and a final pat on the new Baast-nyan model, Romani sprints off, carrying the last of the flowers, with Merlin and Fou in tow.

His feet bring him past the lounge room, where they'd spent some free time between missions relaxing and playing together, foosball, table tennis, console games, or watching movies or videos together. These were the times, few and far between, where he'd let himself truly unwind and be free from his thoughts and worries regarding the demon pillars and the fake Solomon. They'd decorated the room for a number of holidays, for the summer, birthdays, Halloween, and just a few days ago, at behest of some of the younger servants and Mash, Christmas. The colourful decorations a display of their cheer despite the odds being stacked against them, the words "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year" carrying their hope for success in the Grand Order. Photos of those events litter the lounge room walls, each carrying a smile from the people he'd wished the most to protect. With a strengthened resolve, Romani heads to where it all started.

He unlocks the door to the familiar room. Prior to Ritsuka's arrival, it was where he'd stashed his sweets and spent his time hiding whenever another of the medical staff had to use the infirmary. He'd grown familiar with the bed, desk and tv monitor over the months when they'd started recruiting and training the Master Candidates, most of the prior ones from the Mages Association, with odd and even scary personalities. He couldn't help but be nervous around most of them and Olga, so he had snuck out to find a good hiding spot where no one will find him. Or course, that had all been dashed one day when a stranger showed up with Fou uninvited in the middle of his mid-day tea break, claiming the room was theirs.  
"Wow, being kicked out of the mission before it even started, this kid messes up harder than I do." Perhaps it was this first impression that had led to him extending more than the usual courtesy to Ritsuka, the sense of both being out of place in an organization full of stuck-up Mages, or maybe it was just being yelled at by Olga Marie. Now that the humanity is to be saved, would the Mages of the Association treat what's left of Chaldea and Ritsuka kindly, or would they toss them aside after they'd served their purpose and split up the assets of the organization for their own use. As much as he'd hoped for the former, he knew it was best to not hold out hope. After all, it was those same Mages who conducted experiments such as the one who created Mash and the other designer babies, as well as the one on Seraphix with the coffins and comatose and failed Master Candidates... A soft nudge and squeak draws him out of his thoughts, as he turns to see Fou circle his feet and jump on the bed, kicking up the covers, prompting Romani to rush towards it to tidy them up.

"Don't do that, Fou-san! You'll mess th-"

A foot from underneath swipes at his, and he falls face first into Ritsuka's pillow. He could imagine the mocking face of the Caster before his voice even started.  
"My, my, sneaking into the Master's bed. What a creep. Don't you agree, Cath Palug?"

The small white creature digs at his hair in response, kneading it into tangles as it bounces up and down on the pillow and covers. Romani sits up to see Merlin setting down the letter and tea flash on the Master's desk, laying out some forget-me-nots and a single red rose.  
"Me-merlin..? Jus- Just what do you think you're doing?"

"Well, what does it look like? I'm helping you give the confession you never could."

"P-please don't do such unnecessary things!"  
Rushing over to the table, Romani finds himself unable to remove the flowers that the Caster had set out on the table, after several minutes of rubbing his temples and complaining to himself, with a small blush creeping up his cheeks, he starts laying out the rest of the flowers.

Hydrangea, in gratitude of them understanding him.  
Sweetpea, as a goodbye and in gratitude for a lovely time together.  
A red and yellow tulip, a declaration of love and for the smile that makes he feel as though he had the sun caught in his eyes.  
Myrtle flowers - a symbol of love and the Hebrew symbol for marriage.

"Wow, that's a bit much, don't you think? Roman-kun?"  
As the blush on his face deepens, Romani pushes himself to hurry up with his presentation and ignore the snicker from the Magus watching too closely over his shoulder.

A Tea Coloured Rose - for remembrance.  
Purple Hyacinths - in hopes of forgiveness and in apology.  
White Heather - in hopes of their wishes being fulfilled.  
White and Pink Carnations - A symbol of pure love and innocence, and a promise that he'll never forget them, no matter how long he may wander.  
A striped Carnation - as apology for his cowardice and belated confession, and for not being able to fulfill the promise of staying by their side and travelling together.  
A Daffodil - for he felt like the sun was always shining upon him when they were there, in this life, they will be his one and only.  
And finally, an Azalea.

Romani turns to the bed, and reminisces about the times they'd spent, talking, joking, teasing and being there for each other. This was the place it all started, and the place where he'd probably missed one of the times Ritsuka had actually hinted their feelings for him.

>   
After they'd returned from the fifth singularity, although the machines had managed to maintain their body's condition, upon returning from the Rayshift, it became apparent just how badly injured the Master had been.  
Three fractured ribs, a broken wrist, multiple gashes and cuts over their back and torso. It'd pained Romani greatly every time he came into the room to check on their condition, as the quantum observer, it was his job not just to prevent the Counter Force of the Singularity Era from altering the current timeline, he also had to prevent the damage Ritsuka could have suffered in their Spiritron form from manifesting onto their body. However, as Sheba was less stable as the density of mana in the singularities increased, it was increasingly hard for him to guide them properly, as well as work fast enough to overwrite any damage Ritsuka might have suffered. Every scar, every bruise, was a reminder of his guilt and inability. The Staff had started joking that Romani had refused to leave the monitor until he was nearly collapsing from exhaustion, say he had gotten too possessive of his crush Ritsuka, which was even more solidified by the fact that he wouldn't let anyone else handle their treatment. He'd tried to brush them off, of course, but he couldn't help but notice it himself a little, much to his embarrassment.
> 
> "It's my job, I can't be having untoward motives towards Ritsuka, besides, I'm sure they wouldn't like someone as useless as me."
> 
> He'd turned the light and alarm off even before it'd started ringing, sprinting out of the infirmary towards the Master's room.
> 
> He found them clutching at their side, the sheets and bandages having bloomed red, greeting him with the smallest, weakest smile and an apology. Even as badly hurt as they were, they were still trying to put on a brave front for everyone else. After all, were they to lose hope too, the rest of the staff would surely fall into despair. As unfair as it was, even if they were injured or sick, they were the only Master Chaldea had at the moment, so they had no choice but to keep pushing on. The sight of their young, fragile body broken and cut up had broken his own heart. Doubly more so as he felt it was his fault that they had to suffer them in the first place.
> 
> "Yoo.. Doctor.. Sorry to bother you this late at night, but the wound reopened.. wait.. you're still in your lab coat. You haven't been sleeping, have you?"
> 
> Helping pull them up and leaning them against the wall, Romani starts unbuttoning at the shirt that was soaking up their blood.
> 
> "You'd better take responsibility for this, Doctor."
> 
> A small, weak laugh escapes the Master's lips as Romani peels off the garment and starts unwrapping the dressing. Ritsuka had tried to cover up their chest in response, but Romani pulled one arm over his shoulder as he climbed onto the bed to help them redress the wound.
> 
> "Of course. I'll make sure you heal up perfectly. It's my job after all."
> 
> A second laugh confuses Romani, who looks up to see the Master smiling sadly at him. That night, at their request, he had held their hand as they'd fallen back to sleep, watching over them as waves of warmth and softness washes through him, until he'd fallen asleep in the chair by their side. In the rare, peaceful snooze, he'd dreamt of a different world, where one wouldn't have to leave, and the other wouldn't have to get hurt.

He hadn't realized it back then, but perhaps, that was Ritsuka's attempt at flirtation, Merlin grins at him as he sits on the bed and covers his chest with his arms, remarking with a wink, swooning.  
"You were pretty bold back then, weren't you? Climbing into their bed and stripping them while they were all weak and vulnerable. How manly."

"W-well, I didn't mean to do anything aside from clean and dress their wound, I just wanted to make sure they got better, was all! Don't go twisting everything I do to suit your tastes, you slimeball! Now, shoo, wait outside for a moment, please."

Romani turns to the monitor at the side of the bed after Merlin takes his leave with Fou, turning it on and taking deep breaths to steady himself, the red light of the recording camera glaring at him harshly, he picks at his gloves before lowering his gaze and stammers silently for a moment.

"Wahh.. Da Vinci said it'd be best to do it in person, but.... uwahh. Erm, Ritsuka.. I know you may not want to be seeing me at the moment, but..."

He lifts his gaze to find Merlin carrying Fou and waving his paw with a smirk from the gap in the door, and very nearly throws his shoe over at him before the door slams shut once again. Sighing, he steels himself and restarts the record.

"Ritsuka, I know you may not want to be seeing me right now, but, there is something I really need to tell you. I'd written it down on the letter too, but, Da Vinci kept yelling at me to do it in person, so.. haha.. I guess, I'm here now. But firstly.. Congratulations, Ritsuka, you've done well."

Merlin looks up from hugging his knees at the side of the door with Fou curled on his shoulder as the Doctor exits from the room, eyes puffy and hair slightly disheveled, as much as he'd tried to act cool, he probably broke down halfway through his confession. Giving a mischievous smile to the red-faced Doctor as he catches their eye, he stands and puts his arm on their shoulder. "Well, you've said your final farewell? Is there anything more you'd like to do?"

"If I may... could I punch you this one time?"

Merlin swerves behind Romani in response to the query, ducking his arms under the Doctor's before wrapping them in a hold.  
"Well, knowing you, you would surely go for my face, but I need it to make my living, so no. Please try again, Roman-kun."

After he'd freed himself and turned to face him, Merlin notices the magical energy pouring from his companion, as well as the gold flecks that have started to form in his eyes. Ah, he must have revealed his former self on the record to the master, and thus, has abandoned the wish he'd once made to the Holy Grail.  
"Are you going to keep that form until the very end, Roman-kun?"

Green eyes widen as Romani jumps and rubs behind his head, picking at his gloves.  
"I-I want to be Romani Archaman until the very end, even if not just for their sakes, but mine as well.."

Merlin closes his eyes and nods sagely in response, but freezes at Romani's next question.

"Say, Merlin, did you think that King Arthur really had a choice? I mean.. what was it.. "If you draw out that sword, you'll stop being a human." "

Violet eyes widen as his face pales slightly, biting his lips. Farewells was the one thing he had never gotten used to in his many years, and now, at the one with Romani Archaman / King Solomon, the latter had to bring up the one that pierces at his heart the most. What a sadist, laying it on thick like this despite his innocent, fluffy little looks. Merlin breaks from his thoughts as he pouts and hugs himself over the chest, puffing up his cheeks and glaring accusingly at the Doctor.

"W-why you, I feel violated now, how could you bring up my traumatic past like this?! How horrible!!"

"F-f-for the record!! I only saw a glimpse of your past because YOU WERE THE ONE SPYING ON ME during the holy grail war. If anything, I should be the one feeling violated!!"

Merlin mirrors Romani's pouts and gestures, until the two of them burst into laughter. Patting him on the head and ruffling his hair, Merlin tucks a single flower into his lab coat's chest pocket.

"That's better, a hero should smile, even if unsung. As for Artoria, I want to believe that she had a choice, and that she made the choice for the sake of her country and her people. Instead of being an ideal king for her country, the way you were, she had striven to be the ideal king for her people. At the very least, she was human until the moment she drew the sword, and she had some freedom, up until the moment she took the throne. The same couldn't be said for you, could it?"

Romani's gaze softens as he brings his fingers to the flower. An Azalea, the same he'd left for Mash and Ritsuka.  
"Take care of yourself for me, eh? Why should I do anything for a slimeball like you?! So you believe that she did, huh? For me, I was born to be the peace offering between my father and the Lord, hearing his voice and showing his presence to the people, as the God-chosen King. The king who received his graces and blessings, my title had attracted many to my kingdom to hear his wisdoms, foreign kingdoms, nobles and merchants offering their daughters in marriage in hopes of winning peace. Truly, it could have been anyone else, the only thing they ever wanted from me was my title. I'm grateful I'd gotten this chance to live as a human, even for a bit. I probably wasn't very good at it, but, it's been a lot of fun. But now, as with all things, it will come to an end, and this time, instead of leaving a broken country for the ones I will leave behind, I shall take care of everything, so they have no need to worry."

Merlin leans against the wall as he watches Romani walk off, thinking back on the Dawn of Selection, where Artoria drew the sword. Although she meant to be born as a dragon, Artoria was too human to be the ideal king that the country needed, while Solomon, who was an ordinary human, had all his humanity stripped away for the sake for being the ideal God-chosen King.  
"I've said this to her, but it applies to you as well. For every miracle, there's a price to be paid.."

Entering the Director's office and setting down some dried persimmons and berries in a beautifully decorated plate, Romani looks up to meet the photographs of Olga Marie and Marisbury Animusphere. Speaking to the older man, he hardens his gaze.

"Although I do not agree with your experiments, I have to say, I'm truly grateful that you've given me the chance to live as a human, Marisbury. Please rest well knowing that your wish to safeguard the future of humanity has been accomplished. Not by the mages of the Association as you'd have wished, but by an ordinary human, simply trying their best to live for tomorrow no matter how sorrowful the present may be. Also, forgive me for not being able to save your daughter, my very first friend..."

As he headed towards Gate 2, the same one that he'd directed Ritsuka to on the day it all began, he found Merlin leaning by the massive double doors with Fou by his side.  
"Well then, I won't expect any souvenirs, Roman-kun."

Romani pouts, that line had been what Da Vinci had said to him, right before he'd left, leaving her to take care of everything until Mash and the Master returned.  
"Urgh, don't ruin even that for me now, Merlin."

Stepping out of the gate, he finds the blood-stained sand between his feet turning pure white, as the air around him starts to sing.

_"He's here! He's returned! The Rightful King! The King of Magic has returned!"_

Turning back towards the Magus of Flowers, the doctor makes a final request.  
"Please take care of them for me, Merlin."

He's answered by a smirk, as Merlin twirls his staff around and fills the air around them with flowers.  
"I'd actually meant to leave after all of these was done, I'd only come here out of curiousity, you see."

"Oh, give me a break, you!!"  
Romani charges forward as Merlin dodges his punch, laughing and filling his sight with white violets.

"But I've taking quite the liking to the Master, so I'll watch over them for you. Ah, but what if they end up falling for me instead?"

Sticking out his tongue and crossing his hands, Romani quips back.  
"Ritsuka's got way better taste than that!"

"For the record, I do believe I'm much more handsome than you. So wouldn't the Master naturally choose me if they've got good taste?"

"In your dreams!!"

The banter between Merlin and himself had helped him to relax, and Romani huffs off, heading, as he often had during his lifetime, to the inner sanctum of the temple. The blood-stained sands from the aftermath of the battle between the various servants and demon god pillars purify as his magical energy seeps into the Reality Marble, singing him praises and starting to glow with a radiant golden hue, sometimes forming faces and shapes of those whom he vaguely remembers. The excited voices rises and ebbs with each step he takes. "The King has returned!", "Long Live King Solomon." Soon enough, he'd arrived to see a cross-shaped shield partially buried in the sand, as though marking a grave. The face of his beloved Master wrecked with grief and hatred towards the one born of his image and creation.  
  


_The past fifteen years were a dream that I'd used to have thought impossible. Did I cry more? Smile more? Than I did in my 60 years as King Solomon? It was the life of an ordinary human, with a little bit of freedom. With having others treat me as their equal, with being bullied. Being able to make some mistakes with no more punishment than a verbal jab instead of fearing for divine judgement. To be able to slack off even if just a little, to be scolded and teased, or even being laughed at. It was fun. I'd like to think that I was able to become a little braver, a little more independent. And maybe, just maybe, as embarrassing as admitting it feels, I was able to fall in love. With someone, with my life, and with the world. That's why... it'll be alright, there's no need to grieve. I know what is to come. Will you be mad? Will you be shocked? But, please, don't be too sad for me. Being able to meet you has brought me a happiness that is beyond measure. I'm sure, in my wish, that I'd had hope to be able to become a person like you. Someone brave and optimistic, who fights for those weaker than they are._

  


#### The Time of Birth has Come, He is the One who Masters All.

Go forth towards your new encounters.

#### The Time of Crowning has Come, He is the One who Begins All.

Every life, every meeting, all beginnings, have their end.

#### And ― The Time of Parting has Come, He is the One who Lets Go of The World

This is **my** fight for **your** future.

##  Ars Nova 

**Author's Note:**

> After 8 months, I've finally finished it. ;A;  
Some of the flashback events will (eventually) be in Fate/Grand Memoir. (I'll continue soon, I promise)  
Started writing down my messy ideas and they just demanded to be made into a oneshot. 
> 
> Thank you for your time!


End file.
